Morning Light

 

During these past months, I have never felt so disoriented or sad.

Even tho so many dear ones are praying for us and giving us so much support,

it still just feels so very heavy.

And yet the morning light breaks through each day.

We do feel those prayers but the lumps in our throat just keep getting harder.

The tears flow unexpectedly and sometimes not at all.

And yet the morning light breaks through each day.

The frequent trips to emerg are becoming too familiar.

I find myself numb and hardly even

able to speak or to seek God's face for guidance or for strength.

And yet the morning light breaks through each day.

How does one prepare for what's to come.

A large, still unfamiliar new house to rattle around in,

so many loose ends and unfinished plans.

And yet the morning light breaks through each day.

Worry, pain and fear daily and nightly robbing calm and sleep.

And yet the morning light breaks through each day.

I know in my heart of hearts that God has a plan for all of this.

Please Lord, help me to understand and to trust!

To seek the new morning light.

Help me to open your Word daily to read your words of love and hope.

Dear readers - thank you for bearing with me through this lament!

These are my raw and numb feelings.

I know we've been blessed beyond imagination

and I treasure each morning.

Thank you for your precious gift of prayer.

Trusting that the future will be OK.

I will be absent from blogging for some time or perhaps for a very long while.

I know not what lies ahead ...

I want to be fully present during this time!

Farwell for now - love one another, be kind and stay well.

"I lift up my eyes to the hills - where does my help come from?

My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth."

Psalm 121:1-2

"In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice;

in the morning I lay my requests before you

and wait in expectation.."

Psalm 5:3

Until next time ... when things feel lighter and the morning light is brighter!

Lock Down Days

Not too much happening over here,

Still in Covid lock-down which has just been extended till past May 24!

Seven months and counting since bedroom suite ordered,

Retailers continue to struggle and are trying to "hang on",

Shopping online for essentials and not so essentials,

Wayfair purchase - much assembly was required!

Shepherd's Fashions - Ottawa.
Online shopping distraction - I may need an intervention.

Many rooms and corners still unfurnished,

Screen time is way up,

No visitors nor any visiting - even Zoom visiting is becoming rare,

Unseasonably cool weather with nightly frost warnings,

Gardening mostly on hold.

It all sounds so dismal and depressing.

Well, to be honest, it sometimes is!

In spite of it all - Spring is still springing and the days are longer.

The cool weather has made all the Spring flowers last longer than usual.

Tulips at the farm

The woods are abloom with Trilliums

and the blossoms and leaves are just ready to pop!

Mother's Day brought a special delivery by two of the sweetest little humans.

Blinds have been installed - I love them!

The farmland is being prepared and planted

and my farmer has had a slow start. It's hard to hold him down.

If you have been following, you know that he's had a major set-back.

However, the good news is that he is healing and is getting more and more mobile.

Even to the point that he's been on the tractor the last couple of days.

After many appointments, MRIs, Ultra Sounds, CT and PT scans,

we wait to hear what the next weeks and months hold for his treatment.

We feel all the prayers and good wishes from everyone!

Our hearts are full of love and hope.

We feel held in the hands of God and await His timing and plans for our lives.

Till next time ... keep the faith and stay well my dear readers!

When the Sedum grows into a heart.

Two Months

Two months ago we made a very big move ...

from our beloved farm of 41 years to the lovely suburbs of

beautiful Stratford, Ontario.

A dream come true for retirement and still close to "home"

where our grandchildren can grow up on the same farm that their mommy

grew up on!

Occasionally we need to pinch ourselves.

Spring has sprung here and at the farm, the warm sunshine has opened 

the flowers and the leaf buds are popping open.

In all this goodness, there has, however, been a cloud hanging over it all.

Just a few short weeks ago the farmer and I were sent reeling

with the diagnosis of cancer!

He has just undergone 2 rounds of surgery and now we await

further testing and a treatment plan.

Not once did I ever think I would be adding the word Cancer to my list of Labels 

for this blog!

There is still so much to be thankful for:

Quick action by his doctors

Second surgery squeezed into surgeon's busy schedule

Compassionate Home Care nurses

Local emergency availability when needed

The warmth of the sun, bringing renewed life and flowers

Family who helps at the drop of a hat

Sweet grandchildren to love

Surrounded by a caring church family

and for praying friends and family

A risen Lord and Saviour

Our hearts have been touch deeply!

Our hope is for minimal spread of this disease,

For full recovery,

For patience and strength to get through the weeks and months ahead.

These words by Ann Voskamp have given me much to think about:

"Let Hope always carry you or fears will carry you away.
So, even if just for today -- thank God for the hot tea
and the sunlight through our windows and the friend who kept showing up
to make a difference and for your people around you
who you get to look right in the eye today and say those
two words that literally can change everything - THANK YOU.
Let's not let the everyday routines numb us to the miracle
of living every day!

Our Joy ... and Hope

Till next time - We put our trust in the Lord.